oh brother.

we walked through the neighborhood: girl walking in slippers, carrying a succulent as a flag, singing a song to the fading rainbow in the distance; boy on rollerskates, wet hair from the shower, showing up as a surprise to us halfway through the walk; me, tired, worn-out, multi-tasking two dogs, poop bag, mind racing.  he regaled me with a two-block story about two-ball knockout, in which he emerged victorious even though he shunned a teammate.  proud, he was.  i tried to tell myself it wasn't indicative of his overall attitude towards others.  tried to ignore the judgment i was throwing his way.  said the right thing instead: "that must've felt awesome, buddy."

"it totally did," he replied.

then came the breakdown two streets later when he tried to make friends with a neighborhood cat, and his sister approached too quickly and the cat ran off.  then he erupted, yelling "c'mon selkie!" a la

Gob from "Arrested Development", and angrily threw his skates in the garage. me, trying to calm him, trying to tell him he was being an asshole without tearing up his fragile heart.  

me, leaving him alone to gather himself.

then i'm in the kitchen washing two days worth of dishes, and i hear him talk to his sister about his newfound love of playing solitaire.  "hey, want me to teach you?" he says to her.  and while my hands are working, my heart is falling in love all over again, listening to him gently give her the rules.  listening to the best explanation of the game i've ever heard.  listening to his patience, support, love.  

imagining my grandparents somehow watching this; flashing back to being underneath their dining room table while my pa played game after game, calling out to grammie, "another ace, ma!" every now and then.  wondering about our family's propensity for the game, thinking how much i love the word "solitaire", thinking how wonderful it was to be alone with my thoughts while the beauty in the next room unfolded.

she came close to winning her first-ever hand, but lost in the end.  

now they are in her room, and she is drawing on her bed while he plays the game on her floor.  he's calling out to her what he has, how close he is to winning, while she offers up encouraging words.  he's singing "carry on" in a loop, and she joins in the chorus every now and then.  this is all happening while the coldplay lullaby cd plays, and they talk about funny things that happened at school.

i love these two together.