what is there to be said about a dog?
she was my friend for fifteen years, and stayed watch over me while i cried or cooked or slept alone or took walks or watched tv or knitted or played. she was in the room with me when my daughter was born, and licked my son's face minutes after he breathed his first air. she let me bury my face in her fur when i was distraught, always smelling of good, good dog; never a stink on her, never a cringe from me. always smelling of the best dog in the world.
especially right behind her ears.
she traveled with us from california to massachusetts and loved the snow as i did, burying her face in it and eating it with abandon and delight. she made sure of us, kept us together, made us whole and complete by climbing up on the couch and sighing to sleep each night. she was nothing short of a comfort.
she shed pounds and pounds of fur; which today we cherish, knowing we'll be finding bits for years to come. she ate disgusting things and behaved dog-like and had run-ins with skunks in her earlier days. she put up with children hanging on her and babies grabbing fur, all the while patient, tolerant, kind.
in the end, her glacial-pace walks were comical, and yet she maintained her dignity. five days ago she came running to greet me; lopsided and wobbly, legs unsure of themselves--but still, she managed to approximate a run, smiling all the way home.
today, as we sat with her while the medicine did its good, noble work, we told her over and over and over that she was the best dog. and i know this is true. and i know that you reading this may have also had a best dog in your life, and i nod my head to you, understanding that each person's best dog is hers for a reason.
fenway was my best dog. she came running up to me 15 years ago, up the small slope behind the cafe at school, her tiny body buoyed by her enormous paws--a foreshadowing of the dog to come. she came running up to me a few days ago, too. she knew that i was her person.
and i know that she felt my undying gratitude and love today, and i put my head to hers and listened to her last breaths come rumbling from deep inside. i know this. she was by far the loveliest.
i miss her so much already.
