in honor of maya angelou.

my heart is heavy today.  i know ms. maya lived a long, long, love-filled life, but just knowing she has moved on has made me very sad.

how can i explain what she meant to me?

 i know that thousands of people have spoke of her today, have offered words to honor her, to thank her.  i know that my words cannot do much but simply join in the chorus.  so forgive me if my addition is hackneyed or repetitive; just know that i must speak about her tonight.

i found maya angelou when i was a teenager, when i was enthralled by black women writers in general, but there was something so tangible to me about her work.  i felt immediately connected to her, even though, in truth, we had little in common.  at that time, it wouldn't be an exaggeration to say that the only things that linked us were our femaleness and our love of reading.  but i entered maya's story, the story of her life, and i've been filled with gratitude since.

how could she be so open and lyrical and honest and true?  how could she reveal so much about the humanness of us all, while remaining steadfast to her own tale?  how could she offer me validation through her writing?

she told me how to love myself.  she was my model, my guide.  her words comforted me and took me home many times.  

i looked at my bookshelf tonight, saw her section of dog-eared paperbacks, thumbed through them and found passages i remembered, other parts of her story that i had forgotten.  her life, her life!  it is all there, isn't it--the boldness of it--the brazen attention to self-preservation and forgiveness--the ability to persevere--to find joy--to be "singin' and swingin' and gettin' merry like christmas"--to dance despite everything--to live in happiness and wisdom--her words, her life.

given to all of us like the most exquisite gift imaginable.  all of us finding ourselves within her somehow, and all of us eternally bonded by how she helped us become more true to who we are.

she is one of the reasons i call myself a writer.

so tonight, i call upon my sisters like me: those of us who were graced with the good fortune to read maya's words, and to take them forever into our hearts and souls.  i am with you all tonight.

thank you, auntie maya.  thank you for your journey and your light.  thank you for your steadfastness and reckless devotion to bringing forward your truth.  we are so blessed to have been here for your time on this earth.