"watch and learn, baby!" says the voice with my genes
the other voice deep and seasoned, yet only a year older
two friends on a friday night, boys still happy to hug each other tightly
and adore in public.
my son says, "i love to hug hugo. he's just really fun to hug."
dinner thrown together that somehow merged into
something really wonderful.
the mockingbird screeches away in the backyard, occasionally flying
close to the dog, warning her away
the sun gone now, so i'm surprised to still hear him going on and on
like he does.
my feet layer on each other, blue toenail polish chipped and worn
legs unshaven
hair wet and dirty, up away from my face
my eyes blinking deliberately
as if someone turned a dial inside of me
to slow me down.
body achey with the work of the day
moving boxes, stacking books,
cleaning the classroom that has housed me
funny how simple things
can make you hurt.
days away from the end of this time
with these children who work me
who teach me
and i am so happy to say goodbye
and so scared i left something undone.
tomorrow i will cut my hair
even though i am unsure
tomorrow i will say, "fuck it"
and i will be shorn anew
and i will remind myself of the girl
i was before
and i will be fine.
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