my kid is playing the piano in the background, some sort of meandering song that is paving the way for her to become more dear to me. the kitchen radio plays a boston station, and when the dj stops and talks about the weather i can look out the window and agree with her.
snuggled up with my other kid today and watched a movie; my arm around him, smelling the boy hair/shampoo/cold air scent of him, marveling at the momentary connection, grateful for the time when he loves me outright.
tomorrow i'll be spending the day with my dear friends east of the mississippi. we have no plans. we will meet up and make them. there will inevitably be food and drink, but the nourishment will come from being next to them, sharing the same air, and laughing together. after more than 25 years being friends, we are good at that. its one of the things that i'm best at, to be honest.
the snow is still falling, caught in the glow of the streetlamps. it's supposed to do this all night; wake me up with more winter to wrap me with, more winter to steel my soul against the inevitable return to los angeles heat. it does a body good, this cold, these flurries.
this is a good night.
i'm wishing i could take all the people in my life that i adore and need and make them be with me at this moment. all the los angelenos afraid of freezing temps, all the old friends lost to time and space, all the family estranged and strange--i'm wishing that i could have them all here with me right now. i would engulf each of them in a hug, look them in the eyes, and swear that this is a good life we have, made all the better by the fact that we would be together in this dream of a moment.
i would hug you tight, adore you for a few minutes, then send you on your way to wherever you are supposed to be. spend just enough time with you to let you know that i am grateful for you, grateful for whatever we've made together.
filled up, way up, with the kind of love that must make this world stay aloft.
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